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25-й час (25th Hour)

300 спартанцев (300)

Автостопом по галактике (The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy)

Альф (ALF)

Апокалипсис сегодня (Apocalypse Now)

Белое солнце пустыни

Бесславные ублюдки (Inglourious Basterds)

Бешеные псы (Reservoir Dogs)

Бойцовский клуб (Fight club)

Большой куш (Snatch)

Большой Лебовски (The Big Lebowski)


В диких условиях (Into the Wild)


Властелин Колец: Братство кольца (The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring)

Властелин Колец: Возвращение короля (The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King)

Властелин Колец: Две башни (The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers)

Вольт (Bolt)

Гладиатор (Gladiator)

Гран Торино (Gran Torino)

Догма (Dogma)

Доктор Хауз (House M.D.)

Дорога (The Road)

Железная хватка (The True Grit)

Загадочная история Бенджамина Баттона (The Curious Case of Benjamin Button)

Запах женщины (Scent of a Woman)

Знакомство с родителями (Meet the parents)

Знакомство с Факерами (Meet the Fockers)

Изгой (Cast Away)


Интерстеллар (Interstellar)

Как я встретил вашу маму (How I Met Your Mother)

Карты, деньги, два ствола (Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels)

Копы в глубоком запасе (The other guys)

Крепкий орешек (Die hard)

Крестный отец (The Godfather)

Криминальное чтиво (Pulp fiction)

Крупная рыба (Big fish)

Кунг Фу Панда (Kung Fu Panda)

Кунг-фу панда 2 (Kung Fu Panda 2)

Любовь и голуби

Малышка на миллион (Million Dollar Baby)

Место встречи изменить нельзя

Миллионер из трущоб (Slumdog Millionaire)

Назад в будущее (Back to the Future)

Патриот (The Patriot)

Поймай меня, если сможешь (Catch me if you can)

После прочтения сжечь (Burn after reading)


Святые из трущоб (The Boondock Saints)

Семь (Se7en)

Симпсоны в кино (The Simpsons Movie)

Сопрано (The Sopranos)

Спасти рядового Райана (Saving Private Ryan)

Старикам здесь не место (No Country for Old Men)

Теория большого взрыва (The Big Bang Theory)

Терминатор 2: Судный день (Terminator 2: Judgment Day)

Типа крутые легавые (Hot Fuzz)

Тринадцатый воин (The 13th Warrior)

Форрест Гамп (Forrest Gump)

Хозяин морей: На краю земли (Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World)

Храброе сердце (The Braveheart)

Цельнометаллическая оболочка (Full Metal Jacket)

Человек дождя (Rain man)

Шерлок Холмс (Sherlock Holmes)

Эйс Вентура: Когда зовет природа (Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls)

Эйс Вентура: Розыск домашних животных (Ace Ventura: Pet Detective)

Цитаты из фильмов

Собрание цитат из наиболее популярных фильмов. Самые известные цитаты.

Susanna: You use me, you use Raymond, you use everybody.
Charlie: Using Raymond? Hey Raymond, am I using you? Am I using you Raymond?
Raymond: Yeah.
Charlie: Shut up! He is answering a question from a half hour ago!

[Repeated line]
Raymond: I'm an excellent driver.

Charlie: Listen... Ray, I don't know if I'm gonna have a chance to talk to you again. Because you see, these... Dr. Bruner really likes you a lot, and he's probably gonna take you back. You know?
Raymond: Yeah.
Charlie: What I said about being on the road with you I meant. Connecting. I like having you for my brother.
Raymond: I'm an excellent driver.
Charlie: [smiling] Yes, you are. I like having you for my big brother.
Raymond: C-H-A-R-L-I-E. C-H-A-R-L-I-E. Main man.

Charlie: I just realized I'm not pissed off anymore. My father cut me out of his will. You probably knew he tried to contact me over the years. I never called him back. I was a prick. If he was my son and didn't return my calls, I'd have written him out. But it's not about the money anymore. You know, I just don't understand. Why didn't he tell me I had a brother? Why didn't anyone ever tell me that I had a brother? Because it'd have been nice to know him for more than just the past six days.

Dr. Bruner: Raymond's unable to make decisions.
Charlie: You're wrong.
Dr. Bruner: He can't decide for himself.
Charlie: He's capable of a lot more than you know!

[Raymond has jumped in the car with Susanna]
Charlie: Hey, who is this guy?
Susanna: He just jumped in the car.
Charlie: Yeah well he can jump out. Come on!
Raymond: I'm an excellent driver.
Charlie: That's good. Come on! Susanna, why'd you let him get in this car? It's not a toy.
Susanna: He says he drives this car.
Raymond: Dad lets me drive slow on the driveway every Saturday. 'Course the seats were originally brown leather now they're a pitiful red.
Charlie: [surprised] Hey, these seats were brown leather. You know this car?
Raymond: I know this car.
Charlie: How do you know this car?
Raymond: It's a 1949 Buick Roadmaster. Straight 8. Fireball 8. Only 8,985 production models. Dad lets me drive slow on the driveway. But not on Monday, definitely not on Monday.
Charlie: Who's your dad?
Raymond: Sanford Babbitt. 10961 Beachcrest Street, Cincinnati Ohio.
Charlie: That's my address. Hey, who's your mother?
Raymond: Eleanor Babbitt. Died January 5, 1965 after short and sudden illness.
Charlie: Who the hell are you?
Raymond: Uh oh, fifteen minutes to Judge Wapner.
[Raymond proceeds back to Walbrook, ignoring Charlie]
Charlie: Wait, I wanna ask you a question! Hey! Dr. Bruner, who is he?
Dr. Bruner: Raymond is your brother.

[last lines]
[Raymond is boarding a train back to Walbrook]
Raymond: 'Course, three minutes to Wapner.
Charlie: You'll make it.
Raymond: Yeah.

[In a telephone booth with the door closed]
Raymond: Uh oh fart. Uh oh fart.
Charlie: Did you fart, Ray? Did you fucking fart?
Raymond: Fart.
Charlie: [Trying unsuccessfully to open the door] How can you stand that?
Raymond: I don't mind it.
Charlie: How can you stand it?
Raymond: Ten minutes to Wapner. We're definitely locked in this box with no TV.

Raymond: That's my pen. That's definitely my book.
Charlie: Well taking your book is not a serious injury!
Raymond: Serious injury book is a red book, that book is blue.
Charlie: Well forgive me, I've lost my secret decoder ring!

[In a phone booth]
Raymond: It's definitely very small in here.
[Tries to leave]
Charlie: Small, and safe. Don't wanna miss the party. You know that, there's a party in your honor Ray. When we get to LA, there'll be a little custody hearing. Lawyers are setting it up right now. Know why there's a party for you? Because you're the $3,000,000 man.

Charlie: [talking to the woman who answers the door] I'm sorry ma'am, I lied to you. I'm very sorry about that. That man right there is my brother and if he doesn't get to watch 'People's Court' in about 30 seconds, he's gonna throw a fit right here on your porch. Now you can help me or you can stand there and watch it happen.

Doctor: Raymond, do you know what autistic is?
Raymond: Yeah.
Doctor: You know that word?
Raymond: Yeah.
Doctor: Are you autistic?
Raymond: I don't think so. No. Definitely not.

Raymond: Of course I don't have my underwear. I'm definitely not wearing my underwear.
Charlie: I gave you a fresh pair of mine to wear. Where are they?
Raymond: They're in the pocket of my jacket. Here.
Charlie: I don't want them back.
Raymond: These are not boxer shorts. Mine are boxer shorts. These are Hanes 32.
Charlie: Underwear is underwear, Ray.
Raymond: My boxer shorts have my name and it says Raymond.
Charlie: All right, when we pass the store, we'll pick you up a pair of boxer shorts.
Raymond: I get my boxer shorts at K-Mart in Cincinnati.
Charlie: We're not going back to Cincinnati, Ray, so don't even start with that.

Raymond: Gotta get my boxer shorts at K-Mart.
Raymond: K-Mart!
Charlie: You know what I think, Ray? I think this autism is a bunch of shit! Because you can't tell me that you're not in there somewhere!
Raymond: Boxer shorts. K-Mart!

[Ray and Charlie are sitting at a duck pond. Ray is staring off into space]
Charlie: Raymond, what are you looking at? The ducks are over here. What are you looking at?
Raymond: I don't know.

Raymond: Lights out at eleven.
Charlie: Yeah well new rules.

Charlie: Listen, Ray, our dad died, that means he's not with us anymore. Did they tell you about that?
Raymond: I don't know.
Charlie: You don't know if they told you or you don't know what death is?
Raymond: I don't know.

Charlie: Ray, all airlines have crashed at one time or another, that doesn't mean that they are not safe.
Raymond: QANTAS. QANTAS never crashed.
Charlie: QANTAS?
Raymond: Never crashed.
Charlie: Oh that's gonna do me a lot of good because QANTAS doesn't fly to Los Angeles out of Cincinnati, you have to get to Melbourne! Melbourne, Australia in order to get the plane that flies to Los Angeles!

[Raymond is boarding a train back to Walbrook]
Raymond: 'Course it's 10 minutes to Wapner.
Charlie: You'll make it.
Raymond: Yeah.

[Location: on a back road, nineteen minutes to eleven o'clock]
Charlie: We're not in the air, we're not on the highway, I'm on some shit secondary road. I gotta make up some time. I have to get to LA, I should've been there this afternoon, my business needs me. I gotta make up some time.
Raymond: Definitely watch TV but you have to be in bed at eleven. Lights out at eleven.
Charlie: Forget it.
Raymond: Uh oh, nineteen minutes to eleven.

Raymond: [after Charlie throws underwear out of car] Uh oh. Underwear on the highway. Uh oh.

Raymond: I'm an excellent driver.
Charlie: When did you drive?
Raymond: I drove slow on the driveway when my dad came to Walbrook.
Charlie: Was Dad in the car?
Raymond: Yeah.
Charlie: I'll have to let you drive sometime.
[Raymond grabs the wheel and nearly steers them into an oncoming car]
Charlie: Raymond, you NEVER! NEVER touch the steering wheel when I'm driving. Do you hear me? Do you hear me?

[after Susanna kisses Raymond]
Susanna: How was that?
Raymond: Wet.

Charlie: Hey Raymond, remember today when the doctor was asking you those questions? How'd you know the answers?
Raymond: [while brushing his teeth at the same time, Charlie can't make out what he said] I see it.
Charlie: What? Stop that for a second.
Raymond: I see it.
Charlie: Raymond!
[Grabs tooth brush from him]
Charlie: When I say stop it, why don't you stop it? Why do you always have to act like an idiot?
[Raymond begins to laugh]
Charlie: You think that's funny?
Raymond: Yeah funny Rain Man, funny teeth.
Charlie: What'd you say? Funny teeth? What?
Raymond: I didn't say funny teeth, funny Rain Man.
Charlie: You? You're the Rain Man?

Charlie: Who took this picture?
Raymond: D-A-D.
Charlie: And you lived with us?
Raymond: Yeah, 10962 Beachcrest Street, Cincinnati, Ohio.
Charlie: When did you leave?
Raymond: January 12, 1965. Very snowy that day. 7.2 inches of snow that day.
Charlie: Just after Mom died.
Raymond: Yeah Mom died January 5, 1965.
Charlie: You remember that day. Was I there? Where was I?
Raymond: You were in the window. You waved to me, "Bye bye Rain Man", "Bye bye."

Charlie: I'm gonna let ya' in on a little secret, Ray. K-Mart sucks.

Sally Dibbs: Good Morning! Coffee?
Raymond: [looks at her nametag] Sally Dibbs, Dibbs Sally. 461-0192.
Sally Dibbs: How did you know my phone number?
Charlie: How did you know that?
Raymond: You said read the telephone book last night. Dibbs Sally. 461-0192.
Charlie: He, uh, remembers things. Little things sometimes.
Sally Dibbs: Very clever boys. I'll be right back.

Dr. Bruner: Raymond, wouldn't you feel more relaxed in your favorite K-Mart clothes?
Charlie: Tell him, Ray.
Raymond: K-Mart sucks.
Dr. Bruner: Oh, I see.

Charlie: What you have to understand is, four days ago he was only my brother in name. And this morning we had pancakes.

Raymond: Of course you can't have pancakes without maple syrup.
Charlie: You bet your butt.
Raymond: Bet your butt.

Charlie: I'm gonna go take a celebration piss.

Charlie: This is a good one. We don't go out when it rains, this is a real good one. I hope you appreciate this because my business is going down the fucking toilet. I should be in L.A., instead I'm in the Honeymoon Haven motel in Bumblefuck, Missouri because you won't go out when it rains. Mystifying. Fucking mystifying.

Raymond: 97X, bam! The future of rock 'n' roll. 97X, bam! The future of rock 'n' roll. 97X, bam! The future of rock 'n' roll.
Charlie: Ray, enough already! Change the channel.
Raymond: 97X, bam! The future of rock 'n' roll. 97X, bam! The future of rock 'n' roll.

Raymond: Maple syrup is supposed to be on the table before the pancakes.
Charlie: We haven't ordered yet, Ray.
Raymond: Of course when they bring the maple syrup after the pancakes, it'll definitely be too late.
Charlie: How is that gonna be too late? We haven't ordered the pancakes yet.
Raymond: We're gonna be here the entire morning with no maple syrup and no - no toothpicks, I'm definitely, definitely not gonna have my pancakes w-with...
[Charlie grabs him by the neck]
Raymond: OW!
Charlie: Don't make a scene!
Raymond: OW!
Charlie: Stop acting like a fucking retard.
Raymond: UH-OH!
[Pulls out red book and writes in it]
Charlie: What are you writing?... What the fuck is this? "Serious Injury List"? *Serious* injury list? Are you fucking kidding me?
Raymond: Number eighteen in 1988, Charlie Babbitt squeezed and pulled and hurt my neck in 1988.
Charlie: Squeezed and pulled and hurt your neck in 1988?

[in a pancake restaurant]
Raymond: Maple syrup is supposed to be on the table before the pancakes.
Charlie: Ray.
Raymond: Yeah?
Charlie: [Presents a container of maple syrup] Ta da.
Raymond: Ha ha. Charlie Babbitt made a joke.

[Raymond doesn't want to go outside when it rains]
Charlie: Hey, Ray, you take a shower right?
Raymond: Yeah.
Charlie: Well the rain is a lot like the shower, you get a little wet. What do you say, Ray? What do you say?
Raymond: Of course the shower is in the bathroom.
Charlie: That's the end of that conversation.

Raymond: We have pepperoni pizza for dinner Monday nights.
Susanna: Pizza? You get pizza in an institution?
Raymond: Monday night is Italian night.

[Raymond blows their ruse to get into a farmhouse to watch The People's Court]
Charlie: That's it. You blew it. You don't get to see your program. Finished.
Raymond: One minute to Wapner.
Charlie: Yes, one minute to Wapner. I had you in there, Ray! You were in there! The defendant, the plaintiff, you had it all. They are in there making legal history. *Legal history!*

Raymond: C-H-A-R-L-I-E, my main man.

Doctor: Ray, do you want to stay and live with Charlie?
Raymond: Yeah.
Doctor: Or do you want to go back to Walbrook?
Raymond: Yeah.
Doctor: Which is it? Go back to Walbrook or stay with Charlie Babbitt?
Raymond: Go back to Walbrook, stay with Charlie Babbitt.

Doctor: Ray, do you know how much a candy bar costs?
Raymond: 'Bout a hundred dollars.
Doctor: Do you know how much one of those new compact cars costs?
Raymond: 'Bout a hundred dollars.

[in a pancake restaurant]
Charlie: Okay, Ray, we've got blueberry, buckwheat, all flavors, what kind do you want?
Raymond: Pancakes.
Charlie: I know, but what kind?
Raymond: Pancakes.

[Raymond is reciting Abbott and Costello's Who's on First Base skit]
Charlie: Ray, you're never gonna solve it. It's not a riddle because Who *is* on first base. That's a joke, Ray, it's comedy, but when you do it you're not funny. You're like the comedy of Abbott and Abbott.

John Mooney: Are you disappointed?
Charlie: Disappointed? Why should I be disappointed? I got rose bushes didn't I? I got a used car, didn't I? This other guy, what'd you call him?
John Mooney: The beneficiary.
Charlie: Yeah him, he got $3,000,000 but he didn't get the rose bushes. I got the rose bushes. I definitely got the rose bushes. Those are rose bushes!
John Mooney: Mr. Babbitt, there's no reason to...
Charlie: To what? To get upset? If there is a hell, sir, my father is in it and he is looking up right now and he is laughing his ass off. Sanford Babbitt, you wanna be that guy's son for five minutes? I mean did you hear that letter? Were you listening?
John Mooney: Yes I was. Were you?
Charlie: Um, no, can you repeat it because I can't believe my fucking ears.

Charlie: [Raymond making remarks about going to Cincinnati to get underwear] Ray, did you fucking hear what I said? SHUT UP!

[Raymond is afraid of riding in a car on the freeway]
Charlie: Hey Ray, I got a great idea. Stay in front of the car until we get off the exit, you'll get in and we'll take a not so dangerous road, whatever that might me. Is that an idea?
Raymond: Yeah.
Charlie: Give me five, that's a great idea. Give me five.
[Raymond doesn't comply so Charlie jogs back to the car]
Charlie: This guy's a fucking fruit cake.

Raymond: [after knocking the lamp onto the floor] Uh oh! Uh oh, V-E-R-N! V-E-R-N! Homes! What's happenin' homes!

Raymond: 'Course I got Jeopardy! at five o'clock. I watch Jeopardy!
Charlie: Don't start with that, Ray.

Charlie: That's amazing. He should work for NASA or something like that.
Doctor: Ray, if you had a dollar and you spent fifty cents, how much would you have left over?
Raymond: About seventy.
Doctor: Seventy cents?
Raymond: Seventy cents.
Charlie: So much for the NASA idea.
Raymond: [to Charlie] K-Mart, we should go to K-Mart. 400 Oak Street.
Charlie: What did I tell you? After this!

Charlie: You've got a date, Ray, you're gonna go dancing.
Raymond: Yeah.
Charlie: You know how to dance, Ray?
Raymond: No.
Charlie: I'll have to teach you sometime.
Raymond: Definitely have to dance on my date. Have to learn how to dance. Definitely. Now.
Charlie: Ray, you're not gonna have to dance, but I will teach you sometime.
Raymond: Definitely have to dance with Iris.
Charlie: Sorry I even brought this up. You're right, Ray, you got a date with the only famous dancing hooker in Las Vegas.

[Ray has stopped in the middle of the street because the sign said DON'T WALK. An angry driver is yelling at him]
Motorist: Hey you! Hey dipshit! Move it! You ain't gonna move, I'll move you!
Raymond: Have to get to K-Mart. 400 Oak Street. The sign said 'Don't Walk'. Have to get to K-Mart.

Raymond: [to Susanna] Are you taking any prescription medication?
Vern: He likes you, that's just his way of showing it.
Susanna: When I touched him, he pulled away.
Vern: Don't take it personal. He never touched me and I'm closer to him than anyone in the world, known him for nine years. It's not in him. If I left tomorrow without saying goodbye, he probably wouldn't notice.
Susanna: He wouldn't notice if you left?
Vern: I'm not sure but I don't think people are his first priority.

Iris: So, what are you doing in Las Vegas?
Raymond: We're counting cards.
Iris: You're counting cards?
Raymond: We're counting cards.
Iris: That's interesting.
Raymond: We're counting cards.
Iris: I know you're counting cards, what else are you doing?
Raymond: Are you taking any prescription medication?

Charlie: $200 is about to go to the shit house and Lenny doesn't wanna answer the phone!

Charlie: I'll tell you a story about my father, that car in the garage, was off limits to me. He said it was a classic, it demands respect. One day, I'm a sophomore in high school, I bring home a report card, it's almost all A's so I go to the old man, ask him if I can take the car out as sort of a victory drive. He says no. So I stole the keys and snuck it out.
Susanna: You took the car with no permission? Why?
Charlie: Because I deserved it! Nothing I did was ever good enough for this guy. Don't you understand, We're on Columbia Parkway, four kids, and we get pulled over.
Susanna: Accident? What is pulled over?
Charlie: You know, siren, police. Can I finish? Okay so we're taken to jail. The other kids' fathers bail them out, mine left me there for two days.
Susanna: He left you in prison for two days? Were you scared?
Charlie: Yeah.

Susanna: You have his money.
Charlie: HIS money? That man was my father too, what about my fuckin' half? Where's my fuckin' half? I'm entitled to that money, Goddammit!

Raymond: Definitely not.
Susanna: But we an watch TV here, we're allowed.
[Turns on Wheel of Fortune]
Raymond: Wheel Of Fortune. Look at the studio filled with glamorous merchandise. Fabulous and exciting bonus prizes. Thousands of dollars in cash. Over $150,000 just waiting to be won as we present our big bonanza of cash on Wheel Of Fortune.

Lenny: Charlie, where the hell have you been? I've been waiting by this phone for 3 hours man.
Charlie: Take it easy, I was just buying some clothes.
Lenny: Charlie we are in serious trouble. Serious trouble and you're buying clothes.
Charlie: What trouble?
Lenny: The cars. The cars are gone, the buyers want their deposits back, they all do. That's eighty thou, Charlie.
Charlie: $80,000. I don't have it.
Lenny: You gotta pay these people or we're out of business! What am I gonna tell them?
Charlie: I don't know.
[Storms about the desert then yells]

[Charlie is pulling Raymond's books off the shelves, leaving Raymond nervous]
Charlie: You read The Twelth Night?
Raymond: I don't know. V-E-R-N.
Charlie: You read Macbeth?
Raymond: Yes.
Charlie: So you read all these stories and you don't know if you read the book?

Charlie: He's not crazy, he's not retarded but he's here.
Dr. Bruner: He's an autistic savant. People like him used to be called idiot savants. There's certain deficiencies, certain abilities that impairs him.
Charlie: So he's retarded.
Dr. Bruner: Autistic. There's certain routines, rituals that he follows.
Charlie: Rituals, I like that.
Dr. Bruner: The way he eats, sleeps, walks, talks, uses the bathroom. It's all he has to protect himself. Any break from this routine leaves him terrified.

Raymond: 12: 30 is lunch.
Charlie: What do you want?
Raymond: Wednesday is fish sticks. Green lime jello for dessert.
Charlie: You want another apple juice?
Raymond: No, orange soda. Uh oh, it's 12: 31.

[after Ray spills a box of toothpicks on the floor]
Raymond: 82, 82, 82.
Charlie: 82 what?
Raymond: Toothpicks.
Charlie: There's a lot more than 82 toothpicks, Ray.
Raymond: 246 total.
Charlie: How many?
Sally Dibbs: 250.
Charlie: Pretty close.
Sally Dibbs: There's four left in the box.

Charlie: Now casinos have house rules: they don't like to lose. So you never show that you're counting cards. That is *the* cardinal sin, Ray.
Raymond: Counting cards is bad.
Charlie: Yes.
Raymond: I like to drive slow on the driveway.
Charlie: If you get this right, Ray, you can drive anywhere you want as slow as you want.

Charlie: Rain Man.
Raymond: Yeah?
Charlie: Let's play some cards!
Raymond: Yeah.

Charlie: Does Raymond know how much money he's inherited?
Dr. Bruner: No, he doesn't understand the concept of money.
Charlie: He doesn't understand the concept of money? He just inherited $3,000,000 and he doesn't understand the concept of money? Wow, good work, Dad. I'm getting fucking poetic here.

[Raymond is about to go back to Walbrook on a train. He and Charlie are saying goodbye]
Raymond: Very shiny train.
Charlie: Yeah, sure is.

Charlie: When I was a little kid and I got scared, the Rain Man would come and sing to me.
Susanna: Rain what?
Charlie: Oh you know, one of those imaginary childhood friends.
Susanna: What happened to him?
Charlie: Nothing, I just grew up.
Susanna: Not so much.

Charlie: I'm going to see you in 2 weeks now how many days is that before we'll be together?
Raymond: 14 days from today, today's Wednesday.
Charlie: Hours?
Raymond: 336 hours.
Charlie: Mystifying
Raymond: Course that's 20,160 minutes. 1,290,600, six hundred seconds.

Charlie: What's it going to be Ray? What's it going to be?
Raymond: This is a very dangerous highway.
Charlie: How am I going to get to LA?
Raymond: Course driving your car on this interstate is very dangerous.
Charlie: You want to get off the highway will that make you happy?
Raymond: Yeah.
Charlie: Yeah, well you gotta GET IN THE CAR SO THAT WE CAN GET OFF THE HIGHWAY!
Raymond: Course in 1986 46,400 male drivers were definitely involved in fatal accidents.

[first lines]
Charlie: [on telephone] Now it's five and a half weeks and I'm still sitting on four Lamborghinis that can't meet spot emissions standards. Now, how many times you wash out with EPA?
Lenny: [on a separate line] Uh, yes sir, they're finally, uh, clearing EPA; uh, just one or two more days.
Charlie: Three times? You're really on a roll here, my friend; four cars, three times each - that's zip for twelve. What are you, a... mechanic, or a NASA engineer? Now listen, now, I told you I've never dealt with these Lamborghinis before, and yet you assured me that you can deliver these cars within that time frame. Don't, don't tell me that, 'cause I - I'm not even listening.

[after doctors left to make final decision about Raymond]
Charlie: [to Raymond] It's okay, Ray. It's over. No more questions. You don't have to answer anymore questions.

Charlie: [on phone with Raymond's place] Dr. Bruner, it's Charlie Babbitt.
Dr. Bruner: Where are you, son?
Charlie: That's not important. What matters is who I'm with.
Dr. Bruner: You have to bring him back, Mr. Babbitt. Do you understand me?
Charlie: Certainly. No problem. That will be $1.5 million please. I'll take it in cash, check, or a transfer.
Dr. Bruner: Why are you doing this?
Charlie: I'm not greedy. I just want my half.
The Boy: It's bubbly

[from trailer]
The Man: Everything depends on reaching the coast. I told you I would do whatever it takes.
Wife: Like what? Like what?

[from trailer]
The Gang Member: That boy looks hungry. Why don't ya'll come on to the truck?
The Man: You look at him again, I'll shoot you in the head.
The Gang Member: I don't think you've killed a man in your life.

[from trailer]
The Man: [to the boy] I will kill anyone who touches you. Because that's my job.

[from trailer]
The Boy: Are we gonna die?
The Man: We are not gonna quit. We are gonna survive this.

[from trailer]
Wife: They're gonna catch up with us. They're gonna catch up with us and they are going to kill us.

The Man: I told the boy when you dream about bad things happening, it means you're still fighting and you're still alive. It's when you start to dream about good things that you should start to worry.

The Boy: [From Trailer] You one of the good guys?
Veteran: You'll just have to take a shot.

The Boy: How many people do you think are still alive?
The Man: In the world? Not very many.

Old Man: I knew this was coming. They were warning us.

The Man: The roads are peopled by gangs, looking for food.

[from trailer]
The Man: You have to keep carrying the fire.
The Boy: What fire?
The Man: The fire inside you.

The Man: If I were God, I would have made the world just so and no different. And so I have you... I have you.

The Man: The clocks stopped at one seventeen one morning. There was a long shear of bright light, then a series of low concussions. Within a year there were fires on the ridges and deranged chanting. By day the dead impaled on spikes along the road. I think it's October but I can't be sure. I haven't kept a calender for five years. Each day is more gray than the one before. Each night is darker - beyond darkness. The world gets colder week by week as the world slowly dies. No animals have survived. All the crops are long gone. Someday all the trees in the world will have fallen. The roads are peopled by refugees towing carts and road gangs looking for fuel and food. There has been cannibalism. Cannibalism is the great fear. Mostly I worry about food. Always food. Food and our shoes. Sometimes I tell the boy old stories of courage and justice - difficult as they are to remember. All I know is the child is my warrant and if he is not the word of God, then God never spoke.
Bolt: [Looks around corner into an office at the animal shelter] There's a guard.
Rhino: [Starts walking into room] I'll snap his neck.

Bolt: [Bolt and Rhino have gone searching for Mittens in an Animal Shelter. Bolt locates her in a cage in the back] Mittens?
Mittens: [turns around] Bolt? Wh... Wha, what are you doing here?
Bolt: I'm busting you out.
Mittens: You - You came all the way back here... for me?
Bolt: Yeah.
Mittens: But how'd you...? I mean... You don't have any superpowers!
Bolt: I know.
Mittens: Really?
Bolt: Yeah.
Mittens: Wow. Crazy day for ya, huh?
Bolt: It's been a lot, yes, it has.
[pauses, looks up]
Bolt: Are you ready for this?
Mittens: No.
Bolt: Me neither.
[opens her cage]

Rhino: [with upset stomach] That meat lover's pizza is NOT loving me back at all!

Martin: [after Ester pepper-sprays him] Spicy eyes!

Bolt: What is this red liquid coming from my paw?
Mittens: It's called blood, hero!
Bolt: Do I need it?
Mittens: Yes, so if you want to keep it inside your body, where it belongs, you should stop jumping off trucks doing eighty on the interstate!

Mittens: [about people] They pretend they're going to always be there for you, and then one day they pack up and move away and take their love with them, and leave their declawed cat to fend for herself! They leave her, wondering what she did wrong.

Mittens: [to Bolt] The real world hurts, doesn't it? But you wouldn't know anything about that, would you?

Ester: [after seeing her truck explode] Sweet Sister Francis, What did you do to my new truck!

Penny: [after they finish filming] You saved me again, Bolt.

Mittens: [refering to the animal shelter they're being taken to] They always pick the cute ones, the ones that look like you Bolt, but the rest of us never come back out.

RV owner: [Mittens is trying to beg for food in front of an RV] Beat it, stupid cat!
[throws a skillet at her]

[first lines]
Young Penny: [points to puppy Bolt, decisively] That one.

[last lines]
Pigeon 1: [after seeing Bolt and Penny go out to play] Does that dog look familiar?
Pigeon 2: Nope. Never seen him before in my life.
Jenny Lewis: [singing] # There is no home like the one you've got / Cause that home belongs to you #

Bolt: Okay. So what we do here is we give the target a quick flyover, we adjust the trajectory, and then land dead center. Am I missing anything, Rhino?
Rhino: Just the knowledge that every minute spent in your company becomes the new greatest minute of my life!

Rhino: [after seeing UFOs in an episode of "Bolt"] That is totally unrealistic.
Bolt: Absolutely ridonculous.
Mittens: You can say that again.

Vinnie: You know, I gotta say something, if I could say something here. You look familiar. Joey, look at this guy's mug.
Joey: Yeah, you know, I could've sworn I've seen this guy before
Bobby: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Vinnie: I gotta tell ya, I never forget a face.
Joey: He never does.
Bobby: Oh yeah, yeah.
Joey: Never.
Bobby: Yeah, yeah. He's really good with the faces and such.
Bolt: Listen, listen! The man with the green eye. Tell me what you know, birds!
Vinnie: [pause] I know this dog.
Bobby: Yeah, yeah, me too!
Vinnie: I gotta remember, it's gonna kill me. Hold on.
[a bus stops beside them showing a poster of Bolt]
Vinnie: [pause] No, I don't know. I, I, I thought I know.
Bobby: Hey, you ever hang out down on 14th Street with a stray named Kelvin?
Joey: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Kelvin, the Labrador.
Bolt: What?
Vinnie: You gotta gimme something here, cause this is redonkulous.
Bobby: Absolutely redonkulous!
Vinnie: Capisch redonkulous! Ya know what that means?

Louie: Mark my words, Mittens. One day, someone's gonna stand up to you! Someone's gonna teach you a lesson!
[flies off]
Mittens: Yeah, I'm really scared now-
[Bolt jumps in and pins her to a garbage can]
Bolt: You should be!
Mittens: Aaah! Okay! You...!
Bolt: Where is she?
Mittens: Aaah... Who?
Bolt: You know why I'm here!
Mittens: Aaahhh...
Bolt: Where is she?
Mittens: Okay, okay! Look buddy, I- I don't know what you're getting at, but...
[she looks up and sees Joey, Bobby and Vinnie laughing on a telephone wire]
Vinnie: Come on, Mittens. Just tell the guy where she is. Tell the dog, make him happy.
Bobby: Yeah, yeah, come on, Mittens! Tell him!
Mittens: [chuckles briefly] Joey, Vinnie, Bobby, my boys! Would you tell the crazy canine that he's got the wrong cat?
Vinnie: [pause] You got her, pal!
Joey: That's her!
Vinnie: She's the one!
Joey: That is definitely the right cat!
[Mittens looks back at Bolt and laughs nervously]
Bolt: Looks like we're gonna do this the hard way.
[cuts to Bolt hanging Mittens over a busy highway]
Mittens: Whoa! Aaah! You're crazy, man!
[cuts to the pigeons, looking shocked]
Vinnie: Hey Joey, did we go to far on this?
Joey: You kidding? This is the best day of my life.

Rhino: If Bolt's taught me anything, it's that you never abandon a friend at a time of need!

Rhino: Ring, ring! Who's there? Destiny? I've been expecting your call.

Mittens: How do you say "No way I'm doing this" in crazy?

Mittens: Look, genius, you're part of a TV show. You know what that is, television? It's entertainment for people. It's fake! Nothing you think is real is real!
Bolt: That's preposterous.
Mittens: Think about it, Bolt. Since you got lost, none of your superpowers are working, are they? For the first time, you're hungry, you're bleeding... I mean, do you really think that you were born with a birthmark in the exact shape of a lighting bolt?
Bolt: It's my mark of power, cat.
Mittens: It's the mark of a makeup artist, dog!
Bolt: You're ridiculous! Now get down here.
Mittens: No.
Bolt: Mittens, so help me, I will super-bark you out of that tree!
Mittens: Yeah, go nuts. Let's see how that works out for ya.
Bolt: You leave me no choice.
[Barks; nothing happens]
Mittens: [dryly] Oh, the super-bark. Scary, scary. Yeah, that's really, really super.

Ester: I swear, it's like I work with toddlers.

Rhino: It's a good day to die!
Mittens: Not on my watch, rodent!

Rhino: Rhino is awesome! He's so awesome! He's... He's beyond awesome! He's... be-awesome!

Rhino: All my training has prepared me for this moment.
[rushes guard]
Rhino: Die! Diiie!

Rhino: Let it begin! Let it begin! Let it *begin*!

Mittens: Louie, what is this?
Louie: It was a slow week. I mean, that's half of what I got.
Mittens: [stomach growls]
Mittens: You hear this, Louie? I'm starving here. And when the old stomach starts talking, it's not talking to me. It's talking to... the claws!
Louie: Not the claws! Please!
Mittens: I'm holding these bad boys back as best as I can, but the thing is it's not up to me. The stomach's got a direct line to these babies, and I'm picking up a lot of chatter! So, I'll talk to the claws, but in exchange, next week, all your food comes to me.
Louie: But that's not our deal! I bring you half, you give me protection! That's our deal.
Mittens: Yeah, well, the deal just expired. Now, get lost.

The Director: [Checking the latest film for errors] Boom mike!
Crewman 1: Got a boom mike.
Crewman 2: That's a boom mike.
[a man holding a boom mike in the background lowers it discreetly]
The Director: That's sloppy. The dog could've seen that. He could've seen that!
Mindy: Uh, who cares if the dog sees a boom mike?
The Director: Forgive me for answering a question with a question, but- who are you?
Mindy: Mindy Parker, from the network.
The Director: Of course. Let me ask you, Mindy From The Network, what do you see here?
[Gestures toward a screen showing Bolt]
Mindy: Uhh... the dog?
The Director: "The dog" she says. Oh, Mindy. Poor, poor Mindy.
Mindy: Am I- missing something?
The Director: You're missing *everything*, Mindy. You see a dog. I see an animal that believes with every fiber of his being, *every fiber*... that the girl he loves is in mortal danger. I see a depth of emotion on the face of that canine the likes of which has never been captured on screen before. *Never*, Mindy From The Network. We jump through hoops to make sure Bolt believes everything is real. It's why we don't miss marks. It's why we don't reshoot.
[Turns back to the main screen]
The Director: And it's why we most certainly do not let the dog see boom mikes!
[Reaches for one of the screens showing Bolt with a determined expression on his face, while speaking passionately]
The Director: Because, Mindy From The Network, if the dog believes it, the audience believes it.
Mindy: [Unimpressed] Wow. Okay, you want reality, here you go chief. The show's too predictable. The girl's in danger, the dog saves her from the creepy english guy, we get it. There's always a happy ending. And our focus groups tell us 18 to 35 year olds are unhappy. They're not happy with happy. So maybe you should, I don't know, spend a little less time worrying about the dog's method acting, and more time figuring out how to stop 20 year olds in Topeka from changing the channel. Because if you lose so much as half a rating point, so help me, I will fire everyone in this room, starting with you! How's that for real?

Bolt: Hmm... padlock.
[stares intensely at the lock while Mittens tries to get away]
Mittens: Listen Cujo, I got some pretty wicked claws under these mitts, do not, I beg of you do not make me bring out these bad boys! It gets ugly!
[Bolt continues to stare at the padlock]
Mittens: What are you doing?
Bolt: Stay back! If I stare at the lock really hard, it'll burst into flames and melt.
[Mittens stares at him for a second]
Mittens: Now I'm concerned on a number of levels.

Mittens: [Bolt is leaving the studio lot after witnessing his owner working with another dog due to his absence] Hey Wags!
Bolt: Mittens? What are you doing here?
Mittens: Eh, long story short I was tied to a delusional dog and dragged across the country, but that is not important. Now the real question is, what are you doing here and why aren't you in there?
Bolt: You were right about her, Mittens, she uh, well... it wasn't real
Mittens: No Bolt it is real, I was in there just now, I saw her face after you left. She's brokenhearted, she doesn't want just any dog, she loves you. She's your person, Bolt, and you are her dog.

[Bolt's stomach growls]
Bolt: Ah! What is that?
Mittens: What?
Bolt: [stomach growls again] That! Okay, you have two seconds to tell me what you've implanted in me, cat! Poison? A parasite? Poison? Wait, I just said that, didn't I? See, I'm all discombobulated! I can't think straight!
Mittens: [in disgust] Oh, I don't believe this. You're hungry!
[Bolt's stomach growls a third time]
Bolt: [jumps on Mittens] Where is the antidote?
Mittens: Okay, okay! Alright!
[Mittens shows Bolt a trailer park]
Mittens: There's your antidote: food.

Rhino: [singing] There's no truck that I know that can keep in Bolt and Rhino!

Rhino: Bolt! I can be a valuable addition to your team...
Bolt: I'm listening...
Rhino: I'm lightning quick, I have razor-sharp reflexes. Wha! And I'm a master of stealth.
Rhino: Plus, I'll keep the cat in check.
[Mittens rolls her eyes]
Bolt: [Gets down close to Rhino's ball] The road'll be rough.
Rhino: [indicates] I have a ball.
Bolt: There's no turnin' back.
Rhino: Guess I'll have to "roll" with the punches!
["surfs" his ball]
Bolt: Easy won't be part of the equation...
Rhino: Promise?
Bolt: I gotta warn ya, going into the belly of the beast - danger at every turn.
Rhino: [getting closer] I eat danger for breakfast!
Bolt: You hungry?
Rhino: [cracks neck] Starving!

Mittens: Go on, use the dog face. This is gonna be beautiful.
Bolt: [looks confused]
Mittens: You know, beg.
Bolt: [further confused]
Mittens: Do the dog face!
Bolt: What? The dog face? What does that mean?
Mittens: [sighs] Figures, I'm tied to the one dog on Earth who doesn't know how to beg.

Bolt: [trapped] I can not be contained in any container!

Bolt: [Attempting to distract Mittens] That's a weird place to put a piano

Penny: [after taking Polaroid self-portraits of herself and Bolt] That's a keeper!

Penny: Yeah, you're my good boy.

Rhino: [to the guard outside of the studio] I'm going to beat your pancreas with your spleen!

The Agent: Let's put a pin in that.

Rhino: They need a hero Bolt, someone who, no matter what the odds, will do what's right. They need a hero to tell them that sometimes the impossible can become possible if you're awesome!

Mittens: I don't know what's going on here, but I'm just a little bit concerned about the number of lunatics on this trip. My limit is *one.*

Bolt: Are you mad? You don't know the power of Styrofoam!

The Director: How did your focus groups feel about cliffhangers?

Dachshund: Oh. I-I'm sorry. You wanna sniff mine first?

Penny: Bolt, zoom zoom!

Mittens: Look, I'm gonna let you in on a little secret, okay? A little-known cat secret. You know why we hate dogs? 'Cause we wanna be dogs! We have dog complexes.

Penny: Where's Calico?
Thug: I'm not talking to you.
[Cut to Bolt holding the thug's car over a bridge]
Thug: [shouting] Bolivia! Bolivia! Calico's in Bolivia! Near Lake Rogaguado!
Penny: Lake Rogaguado. I should've known.

Dr. Calico: You are beginning to irk me, professor. I am irked, and that will not do.

The Agent: You know, when I was little, I wanted a bicycle for my birthday, but my parents got me a baseball glove. So you know what I did? I pretended that baseball glove was a bicycle, and rode it to school every day. True story.

Rhino: So, where's Penny?
Bolt: She was kidnapped by the Green-Eyed Man.
Rhino: Kidnapped? This is terrible! She could be in grave...
Bolt: Grave danger, I know. But I've captured this cat.
Rhino: An agent of the Green-Eyed Man, I presume?
Bolt: Oh, you presume correctly. She's taking me to Penny.
Rhino: You - you are vile vermin! How do you sleep at night? Penny is most wonderful person ever, and she loves Bolt, and he's awesome, and you're a monster! How dare you disrupt their relationship with your evil?
[Jumps at Mittens]
Rhino: Die! Die!
Bolt: [Restraining him] Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
Rhino: I can take her, Bolty! Let me at them! Die! Die!

Rhino: I'm Rhino.
Mittens: Rhino, the hamster?
Rhino: Well, you know, my ancestry isn't all hamster. I'm one-sixteenth wolf with, you know, a little wolverine in there somewhere...

Bolt: Okay, guys, but I really gotta get going.
Blake: I know, I know you're a busy dog, but if you've got a second, we'd love to pitch you an idea for your show. Tom's better pitching, I'll let him take it from here. Tommy's got the spotlight!
[Tom clears throat]
Blake: Wait for it...
Tom: Aliens.
Blake: Oh, snap!
Bolt: Aliens?
Tom: Audiences love aliens.
Blake: Holla back!
Tom: It'll be huge, man. Huge.
Blake: You can't touch us!
Bolt: Uhh... I - I love it. But I'll tell you what. If you guys can help me find Penny, that girl from the television show, well, I'd love to hear more about this aliens idea, but on the way.
Blake: We got a nibble!
Tom: Don't freak out. This is how you blew it with Nemo.

Bolt: But what do dogs do?
Mittens: Slobber, sleep, chase tails, chew shoes... You don't exactly need a master's degree.

Mittens: [Being dragged by Bolt] Slow down! You're scraping the fur off my...
[crashes into mailbox]

Bolt: I'll release you, cat, when we find Penny.
Mittens: Excuse me? That wasn't the deal! We had a deal!
Bolt: Your deal just expired.
Louie: She said that to me not ten minutes ago. The irony!

Rhino: Would you relax? Every time he did this on the magic box it was awesome.
Mittens: Magic what?
Rhino: You know, the magic box people stare at.
Mittens: Wait a minute! Does this magic box have moving pictures on it?
Rhino: Yeah, and Bolt's pictures are the best!
Mittens: Bolt's pictures. Of course! He's from a...

Rhino: [running, catching up to Bolt] I'm on your six.

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Товарищ Сухов:
…Обратно пишу я вам, любезная Катерина Матвеевна, поскольку выдалась свободная минутка, и разнежился я на горячем солнышке, будто наш кот Васька на завалинке. Сидим мы сейчас на песочке возле самого синего моря, ни в чём беспокойства не испытываем. Солнышко здесь такое, аж в глазах бело.
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